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| 2003-07-24/5:38 p.m. Wow I lead a most boring life, but I find that I spend very little time at home. Honestly I talk on the phone all night, sleep a good deal of the day and then come to work and do nothing for four hours. The one happy thing is that I finished Children of the Storm. I really enjoyed it. I can’t say how good I thought it was. I love li’l Abdullah and I thought the end when Davy was like ‘I would perfer if you called me by my full name’ that was the best. I can’t wait for the next one. It shall be muchos fun I can tell. But by then I shall be in university and wishing that something exciting was happening to me. I guess my big thing that I’m afraid of next year is that I’m not going to have a good time. Like it seems like I’m ready to go, I’m actually dying to go so I can experience college and all that fun stuff but I am terrified that I won’t find people I can get along with and that I’ll spend all my time there studying and not being social. I think that is pretty likely especially with my upcoming semester’s schedule. And then there’s my cousin who keeps talking about coming down and visiting me I have no problem with him visiting, and I actually want him to, but I have this feeling that it’s just going to be awkward having someone who is 10 years older than I am come to visit cousin or not. I love him to death and I do want to see him but it just seems a little odd that he’s looking forward to this so much. I love having him as a cousin and what’s more knowing that he’s like a friend now instead of just a cousin, but sometimes I just wonder why it is that he and I are like friends now. It’s that whole we’re in different parts of life: he owns a house, his friends are getting married and stuff like that; I’m going to university and will owe a ton of money to the federal government. He never went away to college so that’s different as well. I mean he’s still in school trying to get his degree while paying for his house and holding down and job and maintaining a social life. This would be far too much for me. I can’t maintain relationships with anyone, here he is trying to bring me out of my li’l shell, and I’d have to say that he’s succeeding. I can’t wait to hang out with him and I know he wants this summer to be one that I remember. I really do appreciate that he is trying, but sometimes I know I don’t fit in b/c I’ve never been like him, I was never the big partyer in high school nor do I think that I really will be in college, no matter how much Matthew thinks he can turn me. But I really just want him to come and visit me on my birthday. If that is the only time he comes down to Dayton I want it to be then. I’m pretty sure I’m not going to make it to town for my birthday so I want people to come and see me. It’s not like it’s an important birthday, but it will be my first away from home you know? I hope this next year I grow up some and am able to figure out who I am. That’s what I’m looking forward to most next year. What’s more is I leave in 30 days. This is just beginning to boggle my mind. 30 days. One month and then I’m gone. I’m just going to have to suck it up and get over the fact that I’m leaving. I can’t believe it though. As much as I want to leave it still feels like it’s ages away. But it’s not. Enough about stupid school. Have some fun looking at the quiz things I got from Kenny and Bob on the phone last night! ~Kates
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